Crazy Life

Toto we are not in Kansas anymore! Contemplating the last few months in the life of our family is a bit surreal to say the least. It has been 3 weeks since we got to leave the NICU and 11 weeks since our sweet Brylee joined this world. I was more than ready to not only have her home, but to get to be back home with our other two blessings. Brylee has brought nothing but smiles and joy to our house since she came home much like she did in the NICU. Her brother and sister are absolutely smitten with her and in fact we have had to have several discussions on Brylee not getting "loved on" too much. She is continuing to grow and develop, and is responding in many ways to life much like a normal newborn. We hit a major milestone this week as she was big enough to be measured on the normal baby growth chart and is officially in the 1% for babies her same age, WAHOO! It is amazing to me that on the same chart at the same age both Adaline and Maddox were measuring in at roughly 97-99%. What a sharp contrast and amazing perspective on how good our God is to take care of our precious baby. I know many of you have asked about if we have any more information on her brain and what kind of struggles she is going to face. While we still really have no clearer picture of what her life will look like with her brain injury we have been able to receive a little more insight into what our little Brylee has faced in her short life span. Up until this point we were under the understanding that she had a condition called Para Ventricular Luekomalacia or PVL. This is damage that is caused by a lack of proper blood flow to a specific portion of her brain. After her last MRI and further examination from her neurologist we have since learned that she in fact suffered a stroke while in utero. Praise the Lord that she was born when she was and was able to be spared from further damage! Because she was so young when it happened the portion of her brain that it occurred in has essentially failed to exists as a productive function piece. I was able to look at her actual MRI and see that just under a fourth of her brain has been affected by the stroke but by the grace of God the portion that is affected is the best place that an injury like this could possibly be. We are still looking at long term issues with her motor skills and development, but thankfully at this point the rest of her body is healthy, and that is all that we are facing.

I know it probably seems a little crazy to say that all of this has been good or a blessing to hear, but for us just having some clear and concise answers to what our sweet little girl has been faced with is a great comfort. Right now we are continuing as a family to press forward, thanking the Lord each day for the lives of our 3 children knowing that they are each in His perfect loving hands. It really has been a joy these last many weeks to watch how each personality even Brylee's was perfectly orchestrated and designed for our family. From Adaline's constant reminders of what Brylee needs at a given moment, to Maddox's sweet hugs and kisses every time Brylee cries, to Brylee's contented personality I am able to already to see the way that our family has been uniquely placed together, each person taking on a very specific and necessary role. Adaline's arrival in our family grew me up, Maddox gave Adaline a friend and has helped to temper her strong will, and Brylee has softened them both, and stilled my heart and Mark’s. While the days still can be challenging and a struggle I am overrun with joy sitting back and watching the family I have been blessed with.

I have to admit though, that the last three weeks have been a whirlwind for me filled with many ups and downs, highs and lows. I have to daily remind myself that I can not expect Brylee to fit into the box that other babies her age would. I have to take each day in isolation thanking the Lord for whatever milestone and progress is made that day. Having three has been a much easier transition for me that having two was, however I really have to learn how to manage my time more efficiently. I have had my tears and smiles some days wanting to fix everything that has not gone the way that I think it should, and others where I am simply overwhelmed by the magnitude of what we have been carried through. What I really have been struck the most by over the last few weeks is how flawed my design for life is. I would never have picked for Mark and I's life together to go the way that it has, but each challenging, difficult, and joyful step was set in place I believe with specific purpose of bringing us to this point. No one person can prepare you for whatever trials or triumphs you are going to face, but the Lord will use to most magnificent things to bring you to the place you need to be so that he may be brought the most glory. Falling in love with a guy that was given a 50/50 shot at life, having a baby a year and half into marriage, having another baby unexpectedly 15 months after that, and then watching that baby fight for his life after a horrific accident, then watching our family work desperately to recover from the shock and blessing of all of it. None of these were trials I had any desire for or thought I was prepared to walk through, and yet the Lord used each of these to pull me in and draw me closer into his chest, holding on at times for dear life knowing he was the author of all of it, the only one who knew the bigger picture for our family. I can stand tall now knowing that without each of the bumps and bruises along the way thus far I would not have been prepared for the trial we are now facing. I am absolutely growing a deeper understanding of what James 1:2-4 means when it says,

² Count it all joy, my brothers,^[a] when you meet trials of various kinds, ³ for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. ⁴ And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

While there are days still filled with tears, sadness, and exasperation I really am so thankful beyond words for each time we have been brought through the fire and refined. The refining process, however painful has brought us more beautiful results each time, and has laid the foundation for the next step ahead. We continue to thank you all for your love and coveted prayers. We are preparing for a marathon and it has made it that much sweeter having you all walk beside us. We love you all.  The Stratton’s